My Paris Kitchen

This is my first whirl at a french cookbook, and while I’m not at the point that I’m breathing into a paper bag, I’m having some slight anxiety over whether I am going to be able to do french cuisine any justice. I am not a Francophile, I never took french while in school, I have heard french words spoken, but when I see them written down I feel like its a joke I’m not in on. It doesn’t make sense! How do these letters make those sounds?!?! David Lebovitz is a well known chef and recipe blogger. I think I have seen his name, but I could not tell you where or why. Join me, as I dive into the abyss of french cooking for the American soul.

the introduction

Oh, it is such a pleasure to read introductions now. Why have I been skipping them all these years?! Please don’t be like me, read the intros. David sets up this book by giving us a little insight into his life. He has been living in Paris for 10 years and has just now bought himself a home and could create the perfect full scale kitchen. He lets us know how unfussy he was about the typical players in a kitchen. The stove, the fridge, and the counter were no problem. But he WAS going to get the sink of his dreams godammit! He then goes in to how prior to his upgrade in his living situation, his apartment living experience while in Paris was kinda crummy. He had a counter the size of a chess board, a stinky old fridge, and a possessed oven. But still, the man cooked.

This intro is chock full of anecdotes that delight and inspire (french people like to complain, french people are grumpy) but more over, it does its job to make me feel like “aw, this author is so down to earth”. Also, on a personal note, I have moved from a really large kitchen to a really small kitchen. I feel lucky, because it still has all the amenities that you need in a kitchen, just really small and close together. Hearing him talk about his demonic oven and having to put bowls of food out the window on the roof just to get them out of his way really helped me feel like I can do this. I have a dishwasher I can do anything!!!!!

the food

He is a Northern California hippy chef, who is into farm to table. If there is one take away I have from reading his intro and ingredients sections, its that he is picky about his produce, and particular about his poultry. That said, I am a normal human being living in abnormal coronavirus world, and I will select my ingredients as I wish.

As far as food categories go, we have Appetizers (Mis-en-Bouch), First Course (Entrees), Main course (Plats), Sides (Accompagnements), and Desserts (Les Desserts). Pardon me while I express my surprise that there is a difference between entrees and main courses. I had no idea. I’m going to make Fennel, Radish, Orange and Crab Salad, Chicken with Mustard, and Apricot Crumble Tart.

Apricot Crumble Tart: I always start with the dessert because it usually is the thing that takes a while, has multiple steps, or just in general can handle being eaten at room temperature. David lets us in on the big secret that french home “bakers” (his air quotes not mine) get their tart dough from the grocery store pre-made. I mean yeah, we all know that store bought crust is not very good, but is it worth it sometimes? YES! He goes on to tell us that the first time he saw a fresh apricot was in the 1980’s, up until then he’d only seen dried. This is actually my first time baking with an apricot. I am a huge fan of peaches, but have never really gone crazy for the apricots.

Why do people want to use dough from the super market? Because making it at home SUCKS and its messy as fuck. The recipe told me to remove the butter from the fridge about 10 minutes before I was ready to make the dough to let it soften, and then to mix it with the sugar. I did this exactly and the mixer threw little balls of cold butter and sugar all over me and the kitchen. He says “mix the dough until it comes together” which to me means a dough ball, but I came to understand meant that it would clump together if you squeezed it. I blind baked for the first time with this recipe! My kitchen has all new appliances and I have barely gotten used to them. I THOUGHT I turned on the timer, but nooooooooo, I neglected to press play. I grabbed the tart crust out of there I think just in the nick of time. She was very brown, but not burned. Any who, I blitzed up the almonds and butter for the crumble top, sliced up the apricots and this is how she looked after I baked it.

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Do it taste good? Its the shit. Its one of the most delicious things I have ever made.

Fennel, Radish, Orange, and Crab Salad: I wanted to make something that was outside of my comfort zone. I know it seems silly that a salad would be out of my zone, but really, when was the last time YOU spent $22 on lump crab for one meal? David says you can substitute the crab with cooked shrimp or crayfish (crawdads?) if you want to. This recipe involved a lot of prepping and chopping of vegetables. I served the salad with torn radicchio and endive.

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Do it taste good? It came out looking very sophisticated but… didn’t really deliver on the flavor. I didn’t like the Philips jumbo crab meat(I think I’m a spoiled Marylander who is used to fresh back fin), the dressing wasn’t tangy or tart enough, and the radicchio lent a bitter whang to it that was off putting for me. It is a very expensive salad though.

Chicken with Mustard:This recipe comes with a short story about an expensive copper pan he got on sale. The story was meant to illustrate that you should use a large pan or dutch oven for this recipe. This chicken dish requires all of the Dijon mustard you own, and probably more. I used Grey Poupon, which I had my driver buy for me while I waited in the limo. You then slather (slather slather slather) chicken thighs in mustard. Then, brown thick bacon, cook onions in the fat, and then brown the chicken in that bacon and onion fat. This will darken with bottom of your pan quite a lot. Adding wine and scraping a pan is a great feeling.

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Do it taste good? Yah. This was a very rich dish, and I probably should have served it on top of a starch like mashed potatoes or pasta. At the end you add cream and it is just….so good. It is a very poupon forward dish, so if you don’t do the poup, then don’t make it.

final thoughts

This was a fancy meal, and aside from the dessert it took just about an hour and a half to put it all together. This was a great way to break in my new kitchen, and also gave me something to do other than look at the boxes I have yet to unpack. Since libraries are closed, I downloaded this book as an ebook, and I found it to be a really great alternative, especially if you are okay with cooking from your phone. I really enjoyed this book. He is down to earth and encouraging, but a little bit challenging. I want to try a few more things from this book before I have to return it.

My new kitchen is much smaller than my old kitchen, but I proved that it has all the things I need to pull off something actually pretty impressive. I brought over a few pieces of the tart crumble to some of our new neighbors in an effort to out southern them. I plan to use this blog to give me an excuse to make new friends, invite them over, give them a gross salad and make them lie to my face about it.